Laughter often is a good thing and mainly makes me smile but last week it almost made me cry.
Its been awhile since I've been teased for my standards and when I was it was mostly from my "back sliding" friends who didn't care that I had standard's but just teased for something to do in a light manner; but the other night at work a lady in her late 40's said something that really just made me want to cry a little. We were talking about sewing and she asked if I had sewn my skirt, I replied that yes I had and she then asked why I made it so long (mid-calf). I told her that I didn't wear anything that came above my knees. She looked stunned but only for a second, she then proceed to ask me if I was ashamed of my body, I blushed a little and told her that I try my best to dress modestly. She then asked me if I thought my self so tempting that I had to hide my body lest I tempt a man into the "scarlet sin". She carried on by asking me if I was a Christian, I told her that yes I was hoping that I'd be able to plant a seed of the gospel in her heart but she quickly shut that door. She, in a very loud jeering voice, began to interrogate me further but asking if I was one of those "holier than thou Baptist" who looks down on women who know that their good looking and show what they got. This went on for about 15 minutes before I finally left. I was biting my tongue so hard to keep from ruining my testimony and from running my mouth back at her. Thankfully God helped me control my self and I was able to leave the lady with no ill thing to say of me.
Her laughter when she asked if I thought I was to hot to dress in nice clothes, cut deep. I've always tried to keep from looking frump and still look modest and I think (most of the time) that I’ve managed that; but that lady who so brazenly mocked my standards did leave some doubt in my mind. All that night I was slightly embarrassed by my long skirt and the fact that my shirt was buttoned almost all the way up, thankfully this did not last long. Then something came to mind that my last pastor’s wife had once told me, prayer for the people who laugh at you because they need it more than your hurt pride needs it. So I started praying for that lady at first I wasn't to kind in my prayers simply referring to her as "that rude lady" then I got convicted by the hold spirit and began to see her as what I once was. A sinner in need of a Savoir, so instead of being hurt and angry I began to pray for her soul.
I know that it’s not easy to blow of hateful comments but in the end it’s more damaging to harbor bitterness than the comment was its self! Here are some things to keep in mind when people mock and are just plain down right mean about your standards or anything else you might get teased about.
1. Chances are that the person in question is not saved or if they are they are not living the life that they should be, so pray for them, yes easier said then done I know!
2. What truly matters is not what man thinks but what God thinks about our life. We're here to please God not man! Yes, it is nice to have mans approval but some times it is impossible to please God and man.
3. One thing that’s helpful to look back on is the day you made the decision to, in my case, dress modestly and remember why you made that choice to do what ever you committed to do.
4. The best thing to do is smile; nothing throws a person off like a smile! When some one starts to mess with ya just smile and politely say, "I'm sorry you feel that way, I wish that you had the same Peace I have from Christ". I wish I had said that, instead simply just excused my self and left the lady standing.
What do you find helpful when in a situation like this? Have you ever been mocked for your Christian life? What did ya do?
Friday, August 29, 2008
When others laugh
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14 comment(s):
Hello Sydney!
Thank you for this post -- it was a blessing to me! And yes, I have definitely been mocked for standing up for what is RIGHT. Especially when I was younger...
When I was eight, our landlord (who lived beside us) had a little girl who was four, and who had a friend that was there all the time who was eleven. Their favorite thing to do (especially when I was around!) was to play with Barbie dolls -- and, although they're not horrible things, :) I didn't appreciate them and neither did my parents. So, yes, I would get teased for not wanting to play Barbies, and for not wanting to play crude/not-right games, etc...and that happened a lot with other people too. And I've had times where I've been laughed at for standing up for the Lord directly.
You are not alone, sister -- keep up the good fight in the faith! God bless you muchly!
Noelle M.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In His great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade -- kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith -- of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire -- may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls." (1 Peter 1:3-9)
I think sometimes people mock and insult ideas just so they don't have to accept them. Like they're trying to deny the truth. God bless you for not "listening" to her, but praying for her.
You are welcome to link to me and any of my posts Sydny. Thank you so much for stopping by Beautiful Grace. I really appreciate your comment. This is a very neat blog you have here.
Maria Pauline
That is so sad that someone would do that. And to think that just 50 years ago, the others would have been the strange ones! I believe that a good testimony will convict one who knows they should be doing what you are doing. In this case, your testimony did its work!
Keep up the good work - your convictions are worth living up to! You will be blessed and respected!
You did good... Probably better than I would have. :o)
That lady was very rude.
You said the right things, did not speak angry and most important you prayed for her. :o)
On a different subject...
Are you a red head?
I am And I love this! :o)
"Nobody who has known a redhead can say that redheads are tame. Even shy redheads have a burning spark of adventure inside them. Opinionated, hotheaded, logical, loyal, friendly, reserved, whatever the redheads' personality, you can bet they'll have SCADS of it!" -Review of The Redhead Encyclopedia
Have great day!
-Tessa
A nice blog!
Am sorry to hear about that woman.Not that long ago my flatmates, whom I had lived with for almost a year told me I had a dull life, because I didn't go to pubs & niteclubs.It stung!,so I sympathise.Something someone casually remarked on may be forgot about the next day, but for the receiver of the comment,it may sting for days.
I am encouraged by your post modesty is right and good. Looking lovely, and attractive while still being godly and wearing modest dress is really easy.I think you can still dress nice but still be modest. I am sorry about what the women said and the comment must have stung but be glad God has set you apart.
I love your posts and blog.
God bless.
Thank you every one for your kind comments and encouragements.
Yes, Tessa, I am a redhead! I've seen that quote before but had forgetten all about it untill you mentioned it! It always makes me grin!
Wow, Syd, I am very sorry for what happened, but so thankful to know that you displayed Christ in your words and actions. I know He is very proud of you and whether or not you see the fruits of your labor you were a light for Him.
I have never been mocked for my clothing. I've been asked about dating and homeschooling, but usually people are too shocked by the fact I've never dated to mock me.
Praying for you and this woman... that her heart is opened. When I get the Feelin' Feminine cards printed I want to send you some. Maybe you could leave it at work and others can visit and see how ladies can dress fashionably, in a long skirt, and still be modest. :)
Keep standing up girlie!!! I dearly love skirts too and wear them every day. You are NOT the only one!!! :-)
That's great!
I haven't, not that I can remember, been teased about something, but I have had different ladies ask about "why I homeschool" and things like that.
Good work!
-Rose
I'm so sorry for how that lady approached your modesty. I am so glad to hear you chose to pray for her instead of being bitter =)
It's strange, but older ladies often are the most scoffing at modesty, you'd think it'd be younger people. But though I hardly see older ladies dress modestly (I'm not saying that older ladies do not dress modestly, just not those around here) but I do sometimes see young girls (my age and around, I'm nineteen) dressing modestly and it cheers my heart everytime I do.
We live for the applause of Heaven and not of men, but it's sometimes hard to take the scoffing of men, just never let it cause you not to hear the applause of Heaven.
You are not the only one dressing modestly, I've started lately, I'll admit, but I do also often feel lonely and a bit weird to dress the way I do. But I think it's prettier to dress modestly than to show off your body. It's not about being ashamed. It's about honouring God and be loving and kind to your Christian brothers.
I have seldom been mocked for my Christian life (just on a question whether or not I'd save sex for marriage) but then I'm not very good at standing up for it either. I am not ashamed of Christ, but I struggle with living it.
When it comes to modest dressing I've been deeply encouraged by two things:
*I sensed when I was in school, that boys acted differently around me when I dressed modestly and when I did not. I liked so much more the way they acted around me when I did dress modestly.
*I've seen Christian men I know, and deeply respect, being unable to move their eyes away/eyes drawn to immodest subjects and everytime I think of that I am encouraged in that I do not draw that kind of attention to my body and do not tempt Christian men who struggles to be pure in body and mind.
I am so proud of you, and so glad that you choose to dress modest. You did wonderfully in being scolded by that lady.
Peace to you,
åslaug (www.rizpah.blogspot.com)
Hi! I just stumbled across your blog and really liked it.
Thank you for sharing this story. I have been teased and laughed at for things like that too. You definitely did the right thing.
~Zoe
Thank you for sharing this story. I have had some people make fun of how I dress modestly, but nothing like that. In situations like these, I just remember that God is pleased with the way I dress, my parents are, my siblings are, and my friends are. In fact, I have had mothers come up to me and thank me profusely for dressing modestly. People who visit our church are highly impressed by the way the women at our church dress. They tell us that they feel comfortable taking their sons to my church, because we dress modestly.
I have even had a couple of young men come up to me and thank me for dressing modestly, and for not being a stumbling-block.
The main thing is to remember that God will reward you for not being a stumbling-block.
As to what the lady told you about not "showing off" your figure, or thinking that you are so tempting that you are hiding it, remember that they are the ones that will eventually be punished for their dress, and not you.
Thank you so much for posting this blog Sydney! I wish that a lot more girls thought the way that you do.
In Christ,
Faith Christine
That is so true. I just started wearing skirts almost all the time, so I haven't received a lot of flack. My Mom told me once that I will probably even get teased by believers because they don't have as high standards.
BTW, I love your blog. Keep up the good work!
~Joanna
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